This feels so good. Emiko is amazingly skillful and obviously takes her profession very seriously. This is my second visit to this hairdresser and I am having the obligatory head massage and shampoo but with a difference. I owe it all to my first visit a couple of months ago when I met Emiko the shampooist and had an excellent head massage, or so I thought at the time, but nothing can beat the massage I am receiving this time around and it is all because of a few well chosen words.

I gave strength-centered feedback to Emiko that first time when she finished the massage and shampoo. I said, “Emiko, you are truly masterful. That wash and head massage was so relaxing and invigorating, it was the best I have ever had.” I said this with conviction and I honestly meant it.

Well, now you know the reason for my feeling of bliss at the moment. When I came back this second time, you can be sure that Emiko remembered my name and she made sure I received a longer, more intense massage than the first time.

It got me thinking about Naoyuki and what he said about his disengaged sales team.  Naoyuki is the sales director of a large Japanese IT company and runs a team of around 50 sales professionals who sell what they have to but no more. I asked Naoyuki about how management at his company operate and found that they tend to be distant, seldom stray from their offices or meetings and provide feedback only when it is negative. Naoyuki confirmed this to be the normal way of managing in Japan and it gets the job done, which is the main focus of management anyway, but he wanted to do more.

We discussed how recognition in the workplace may help to engage his sales team to go the extra mile. I explained how there are three types of workers – engaged, disengaged and actively disengaged. The disengaged work the required hours, do the work and go home, but have no connection to the workplace. The actively disengaged are more dangerous and feed negativity, undermine the work of others and express mistrust and animosity. When you have both these types of workers in your organization, it can do a lot of damage and cost a lot of money due to disengagement.

On the other hand, people who are engaged believe they make an impact, would recommend it as a good place to work and get more than just a salary from working there. It might seem like common sense but it is amazing how many bosses ignore the fact that if employees feel appreciated, recognized and part of the company, they are less likely to leave.

A little of the “right kind” of praise in the workplace certainly goes a long way. Sometimes we think that just saying “job well done” is recognition enough. And of course it is nice to hear but in a lot of cases, this sort of praise becomes flattery, it is stating the obvious and not really all that much appreciated if we hear it regularly and without conviction. Especially if this is the only kind of recognition we receive.

The key to delivering the “right kind” of praise is to aim for an insight into a person. Start with strength-centered feedback, that is, a personality trait or characteristic that you have noticed. Then follow it up with evidence which supports what you have noticed. It doesn’t need to be long winded and rambling, short and to the point is always best. And be sure to deliver your praise with conviction and honestly mean it. You will know you have made a breakthrough when the other person responds by saying something like “am I?” or “I didn’t know that.”

Naoyuki realized he missed opportunities to show genuine appreciation to a large number of his staff and he recognized the strengths of others requires a conscious effort, and surprisingly, it doesn’t take up too much time.

I took him through the acronym TAPE we use for giving praise.

T Things – refers to items people own or possess, people are usually proud of what they have. Be careful in giving praise in this area, it can sometimes seem too obvious or feel like false flattery.

A Achievements – are areas of study, research projects, or anything that takes focused, concerted effort.  People are generally proud of their achievements, and appreciate receiving recognition for them.

P Personal Traits – are the positive characteristics people possess that make them unique.  These form the basis of the most powerful feedback we can give.

E Evidence – gives our statement credibility and believability, so people know your observations about them are sincere.

Personal traits combined with evidence is the basis of creating strength centered comments as a form of praise. Once we commit to doing it, it becomes second nature.

Awaking from my dazed state, reinvigorated and relaxed thanks to Emiko’s exceptional head massage, I reflected on the success Naoyuki achieved in turning around his sales team to go that extra mile. It certainly is a wonderful thing, a little of the “right kind” of praise.

4 Comments

• 

  electric2004 at 10:36 PM JST - 26th June

  ... Emiko’s exceptional head massage - yes this and a beer, that would be good now.

• 

  Sarge at 10:44 PM JST - 26th June

  electric2004 - My hairdresser always gives me an exceptional head and shoulder massage and I always praise her!

• 

  electric2004 at 12:34 PM JST - 27th June

  Yes, I can imagine your satisfaction. Such haircut costs probably from 2000 Yen on upwards. This is good, when being single. To save some money, I usually go to the 3Q cut, which is only 1000 Yen including tax. But no massage. However, my little boy (3 years) likes the 3Q, because he can sit in a model car (Volkswagen new beetle) and watch his favorite animation during his haircut. And it seems, it is fun for the hairdresser, too.

• 

  GW at 09:12 PM JST - 27th June

  ok Craig I hope you remember to add a little extra $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ when the job is well done, as $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ is what makes the world go rounds, sounds like your just big into gomasuri & then letting higher ups collect all the $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

  your methods will work short term at best & then most will be extremely disengaged

Register or login to add a comment!