You can learn a lot about Japanese culture from kindergarten classes

By R D Muth

When I walked into the Japanese kindergarten on my first day as an English teacher, I had to fight the urge to duck and run for cover. It was like stepping foot into a giant birdcage at the zoo. Everywhere I looked, children were loudly screeching and clawing at one another, leaping off the plastic slide and hanging upside down from the basketball hoop. It was terrifying.
And braving the front lines was my ballerina-frail Japanese co-teacher, a 24-year-old in pigtails and a Big Bird apron.

“Sit down, please” she repeated to each child, in the same soft, barely audible tone of voice. It had about as much of an effect as trying to catch a flock of wild geese with a butterfly net. What she really needed was a tranquilizer gun.

This wasn’t how I’d imagined it. Before coming to Japan, I’d pictured my co-teacher as a middle-aged, no-nonsense Mary Poppins-type, with a bun and a soft spot for Disney songs. My students would, in turn, be well-mannered, docile children who respected and revered their English sensei.

But as I discovered in the months to follow the reality was different. Kindergarten teachers in Japan are more “human piñatas” than “highly-respected figures of authority.” In my first week alone, I had erasers hurled at my head, chalk dust thrown in my eyes, and my handbag tossed out of a second story window.

“Japanese children are monsters,” I raged to my English teacher friends. “Haven’t their parents heard of ‘Time outs’? Or better yet, clear, consistent rules?”

As an American, I’d grown up with the idea that a “good mother” or a “good teacher” was someone who set strict boundaries and consequences. And I’d assumed that these standards were the same the world over.

But in Japan, rules aren’t considered nearly as important as fostering the development of a mutual child/teacher friendship. The theory is that if children have close bonds with their teachers they won’t misbehave because they’ll be afraid of disappointing them. As Roger J Davies and Osamu Ikeno put it in their book “The Japanese Mind,” a “good parent” does whatever possible to “avoid creating any mental distance from their children,” even if it means giving in to their children’s demands. Or in the case of my Japanese co-teacher, not reacting when 5-year-old Kenshiro slaps her across the face.

“Ouch, you really hurt me,” was all she said. She didn’t scold or punish or arrange a parent-teacher conference. She simply rubbed her cheek, made an exaggerated show of wincing in pain and then continued on with the lesson as if nothing had happened.

But apparently, this non-reaction is all part of a bigger plan. By drawing attention to the pain he’d caused her, my co-teacher hoped to shape little Kenshiro into a good team player, a sensitive soul acutely tuned in to the feelings of those around him. And according to The Japanese Mind, this isn’t limited to the feelings of family, friends or pet goldfish — it’s even applied to the likes of the lowly houseplant or piece of old furniture, as I would learn when I caught little Kenshiro trying to knock over the classroom bookshelf.

“Kenshiro!” I hollered, for the third time that morning. “Don’t do that!’” He stared at the floor, his face as blank as a chalkboard.

“You’ve hurt the bookshelf,” my Japanese co-teacher translated softly, as she crouched down to his eye level. She gently touched the spot which moments before, Kenshiro had been bashing with a hula hoop. “He’s crying.”

I stared at her incredulously. Did she really think that hippie mumbo jumbo was going to work? If the kid didn’t care that he was about to cause his teacher to suffer a nervous breakdown, he certainly wasn’t going care about the hypothetical feelings of an inanimate object.

But then, something truly amazing happened. Kenshiro gazed at the bookshelf reproachfully and mumbled: “Sorry.”

I recounted the story to my English teacher friends over beers later that night. They dragged on their cigarettes and regarded me thoughtfully.

“Japanese kindergarteners are like a group of untrained synchronized swimmers,” one friend commented philosophically. “Right now they’re flailing around, half-drowning. But give them a few years and they’ll be swimming in sync like robotic pod-people.”

I was dubious. I could imagine the children making an entertaining half hour of “Super-Nanny: Japanese Kindergarten Edition,” but well-mannered and disciplined? No way.

My teacher friends looked at each other smugly. “Just wait until you start working at a Japanese middle school. You’ll see.”

R. D. Muth is an English teacher from Hawaii.

This commentary originally appeared in Metropolis magazine.

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Latest 15 of 28 Total Comments Show All

KaptainKichigai at 10:31 PM JST - 13th April

zoechan- a "real" school is one that requires its teachers to have teaching liscenses. Just like anywhere in first world countries. Not a private school or someones basement that is looking to make a buck and rolls foreigners out for fashion or for show. I dont mean to disrespect the foreigners that work at these establishments. Everyone needs to earn a paycheck. Just knock off the editorials about "teaching English" in Japan while working for these Japanese money making schemes and calling it the educational status quo in Japan. There are plenty of liscened foreign teachers in Japan that dont wander into a job describing the experience as this "journalist" does..."flailing around, half drowning."
sydenham at 06:15 AM JST - 14th April

I find that making generalizations about an entire culture from one limited experience leads to true enlightenment.
klhchicago at 08:56 AM JST - 14th April

Obviously written by a novice of both Japanese culture and kids. Not worthy of a posting since it is one of generalizations as another poster noted.
fatboysosa at 09:40 AM JST - 14th April

Culture Shock...
GenkiDesuKa at 09:49 AM JST - 14th April

You should read this book -- or see the video.

http://tinyurl.com/cxqbqq
tasha77 at 09:55 AM JST - 14th April

Just like a horse heading home....maybe the kindy kids got a smell of the inexperience and let loose.
mojibake at 10:41 AM JST - 14th April

applauds for syndenham
scoobydoo at 01:58 PM JST - 14th April

Hmmm I never had trouble with the kids doing the wrong thing after they realized they would get in trouble and following the rules was more fun. Obviously the story is not from a long termer. Mind you, I was asked not to let the parents see my methods but the end result was the parent were happy because the kids were happy in the end. I wonder about one comment of teaching English to Japanese requiring a license after having seen many teachers with more degrees than a thermometer who were just pathetic. I think many kids get stupidity from their parents and I don't mean geneticaly.
gogogo at 05:18 PM JST - 14th April

No wondering the EDU system in japan is so messed up.
KaptainKichigai at 08:19 PM JST - 14th April

scoobydoo- and I wonder what "methods" you were hiding from these kids parents. A quick self check test- if you need to hide it, you probably shouldnt be doing it. Teachers with more degrees than a thermometer does not mean they have degrees in education. Does an economics degree(or 10) qualify a teacher at your childs kindergarton in your home country?. Of course not. Degrees in education with proper teaching certifications are what I am referring to. And of course, anyone can be a schlub regardless of their education, experience or background. Its just not usually the case.
Sarge at 08:40 PM JST - 14th April

"not reacting when 5-year-old Kenshiro slaps her across the face"

5-year-old Kenshiro needed to be put into the corner for a little while.
usaexpat at 11:16 PM JST - 14th April

Maybe the writer is just a little too tightly wound, I taught kindergarten and elementary English back in the day and never found the kids to be any worse than in the states or for that matter my own children. The approach that the writer sites with his co-teacher and Kenshiro is a perfectly fine way of getting a child to change their actions as stated it worked and Kenshiro appologized. Not really sure what the point of the article was accept that I'm guessing the writer hadn't really worked with young children before this episode.
usaexpat at 11:20 PM JST - 14th April

KaptainKichigai: I would guess that better than half the foreign teachers here are as you say schlubs teaching degree or no. A piece of paper and a bunch of college classes that were slept through does not make a good teacher if the temperment isn't there.
Bungleer at 05:50 AM JST - 15th April

So the country my children go to kindergarten is most likely not Japan.

Funny enough at our kindergarten the children are pretty well-behaved (as much as you could expect at that age) and our kindergarten even has a reputation of being far less strict than the others in the vicinity.
KaptainKichigai at 02:53 PM JST - 16th April

usaexpat- a teaching certification is given after a teacher has spent said number of hours (usually a year) in the classroom. If the temperment isnt there, the certification usually isnt given. Its not just a piece of paper. People that choose education as a career are very serious about it. (Of course not in all circumstances.)