Is Japan a good place to raise children?

Monday 13th July, 04:13 AM JST

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gogogo at 06:42 PM JST - 17th July

In a word, no.
BeaverCleaver at 06:55 PM JST - 17th July

Spider, glad to see you asking for a source, that is always sensible. But the assertion of the other poster is not even related to the original statement. Even if it were true that abortion were the number one method of BC (which is not even unprovable since you cannot accurately measure condom use) that simple statement would not prove that the number of teenage pregnancies are higher or lower than anywhere else.
fuguyoutoo at 11:07 PM JST - 17th July

Klein2 promised us a new take on this topic and then turned right around and served up more of the same ol same ol anti American nonsense. If I wanted to I could spend the rest of this post shooting down every so called reason you have for choosing to raise your kids in Japan. For example, Eric Cartman ? Yeh, like crayon shin chan and his foul mouth is any better ? And if it’s a warped sense of identity or so called “super hero” mentality that rubs you raw, well look no further than Akihabara ! You’ll find more than your fair share of disenfranchised comic reading reality challenged akb48 chasin’ upskirt photo takin’ glassy eyed teens ! And what makes you think your kids will have an advantage when it comes to math and sciences ? The USA is the world leader in advanced technology and has the Nobel prizes in science to prove it ! Klein2 bud are you for real ? Shake yourself for one minute and ask a simple question, If Japan is such a great place to raise kids… why have the locals stopped doing it? And at record proportions! Now if I may. In my opinion the criteria for raising kids falls under a few categories. The first of course is education. And I for one see no reason to send my kids to an institution that is nationally recognized to be so poor that every Japanese parent feels the need to send their child to a cram school every night of the week for 2-3 more additional hours of instruction. And even then statistics indicate that Japanese children are continuing to fall behind other nations that employ this same method. Nope, I prefer my kids get involved in after school sports or community activities. The second criteria on the list is; personal growth. Japan with its dependency on others mentality simply can’t prepare its youth for the realities of the world. Japanese children are over-dependent on mom from day one. Japanese children learn little about independence instead they are forced to rely on others virtually all the way through their young adult years. I love the fact that I learned to drive a truck on my uncle’s farm. Or that by the time I was 15 I had had enough part time jobs to buy my own car. Japanese children stand there with their hands out asking mom and dad for money their whole lives. The explosion in parasite singles here only adds evidence to how failed the society really is. My third criteria is; home life. Japan simply can’t compete with more advanced nations. Houses here are small, there is no privacy, the whole idea of- sleeping on the floor- eating on the floor-watching tv on the floor- playing on the floor… it’s all third world to me. It’s uncomfortable, dirty, and humiliating to live a life groveling around on-the floor! The fact that the father isn’t around is also a poor comment on Japan’s society. Anyone else see the NHK portion of “Okasan to isho ni” with the short video explaining why dad isn’t around the house ? God this is humbling to say the least. That’s right, NHK has a video segment where we see dad wolf down his breakfast, rush out the door, and spend his whole waking life a slave to corporate Japan. The video tries to explain to youngsters why papa isn’t around… how sweet ! Finally; safety. Japan is simply unsafe, especially for children. Crowded streets, stalkers, evil sickos in the porn industry, mentally

disturbed mixed in with the general population, teachers of questionable character, an apathetic police force, and more drugs and alcohol than you can possibly imagine. Japan is no different than many other countries in the sense, except for large doses of denial that linger about in many of the communities. One of the most shocking realities of Japan now is the fact that virtually every grade school kid in the nation has some kind of security device on him or her at all times. These kids have to walk in packs to and from school, they have phones to check in with parents and school officials, many are even escorted by their parents or volunteer adults… I see them by the dozens every day. Sorry, I walked to and from school for 10 years. Sometimes alone, sometimes with friends. My safety was never in question and I never once felt threatened. Japanese kids simply can’t say that. So again klein2 I ask you, if Japan is such a great place to raise your kids… why isn’t anyone, locals or foreigners, flooding the hospital wards to experience the wonder of it all?
nigelboy at 12:42 AM JST - 18th July

I think fuguyoutoo is comparing Iowa to Tokyo.

If someone wants to compare the education level of each nation ON AVERAGE, the PISA test scores are the best indicators where U.S. is like the near bottom among the OECD nations.
fuguyoutoo at 12:51 AM JST - 18th July

And nigelboy just can't help but embarrass himself in public. unfortunately your "on average" statement is anything but ! Japan is very careful about what schools participate in PISA tests. The US is not ! Subsequently you get schools from the US packed with immigrant kids who can barely speak the language competeing with some of Tokyo's cram school elite ! Sorry Nigelboy, I'll take the American way of education over Japans any day of the week. Now if you choose to respond to this manhandling, start by first telling us all what you know about the American education system. I doubt you truly understand it. For if you did, you wouldn't be quoting PISA scores... bwahaha !
cleo at 01:11 AM JST - 18th July

you get schools from the US packed with immigrant kids who can barely speak the language competeing with some of Tokyo's cram school elite !

Do you have a link to back that up with?
Klein2 at 02:20 AM JST - 18th July

Sorry so long everyone. Might be interesting, and it is topical.

The topic is

Is Japan a good place to raise children?

My experience says YES! I vote with my feet. I am sincere.

Fuguyoutoo:

The Japanese elite are unwilling or unable to have kids, and poorer people find it is expensive. Oh well. So much the better for me and mine. Your whole post turns on this idea that Japanese people know what is best. Then you use aggregate data, which might not reflect many parts of Japan. Although Japanese in general are not having many kids, a lot of kids live near me. You make another mistake in that you are contrasting urban Japanese life with rural American life. Your method explains your conclusions.

And you misunderstand my points. I am not anti-American. Do you realize how dumb that sounds? You go enjoy. More power to you. I grew up in the states. I know what is here and what is there. I have great memories of fun times, many of which would land me in jail these days. For the record, I started working when I was 14 (you slacker) and paid for my own car and my own insurance and gas. Started driving my own car--pinkie in MY name--when I was 15. I walked to school a total of 14 years (slacker) if you count college and grad school. So there you go. What is anti-American about that? I was filling out W-4's and paying taxes long before I entered high school.

I wanted to give my kids something like that and felt it was unlikely to be done smoothly in the US in the many places I know of there. So I do it here. In Mayberry, Japan.

I do not see the Japan you see. It sounds as though Cleo and I found similar places. Children bow at crosswalks. The postmen smile. Everyone knows where to find me when they need me. The kids know the names of the neighborhood dogs. We have village idiots, monkeys, tanuki, poison snakes, and a fishing hole. We have community bbqs twice a year. The local high school has a great baseball team. We have a nice house and a productive garden. We live among scientists and doctors and teachers, a Nobel prize winner, and a well known actress. We have a chonaikai. No successful cram schools. My daughter was earning her own money at age 10. My son at 8. My kids have bicycles and no security devices. Oh it is not halcyon, but of the things you list above, almost none exist here. It has been remarked by others that parents matter. That is true. My kids do not watch TV unsupervised. We talk a lot. We are not super consumers. We spend pretty heavily on books, but we download the classics from Gutenberg.org for free. I help the police sometimes. Just like waitresses and bureaucrats I meet, they are politely soldiering on, struggling to do their jobs as things get increasingly complicated. I have not met an arrogant Japanese person in years. Am I just lucky?

It sounds like you live huddled, shaking in a hovel. It must be some dog patch in Tokyo or Osaka. If that is what you see of Japan, you need to set higher personal standards. Most foreigners come here for money. Some bring their kids. Too bad. They hang out in the major cities, avoid learning the language, drink too much, and then complain about what they find. Some people are miserable wherever they go. The money and all the dreck are always going to be in the big cities. I have had my share of bad Japan days too, but I have found a better place.

You keep on telling people how bad Japan is, please. I am not eager for this place to become Provo, or Plano, or Portland.
fuguyoutoo at 02:49 AM JST - 18th July

Klein2, I'll engage you on this discussion...

"I wanted to give my kids something like that and felt it was unlikely to be done smoothly in the US in the many places I know of there. So I do it here. In Mayberry, Japan."

Honestly now... you had to travel 5,000 miles to find Mayberry ? I believe you passed thousands of Mayberrys in your search. Japan can't even begin to offer a smidgin of the total growth experience provided in the USA. The only thing your kids will learn here is "gaman, gaijin, and taihen" ! The place is a deadend. I want you to think back on your childhood. Your friends, sports, classmates, holidays, family gatherings, outdoor rec events... Japan offers none of this for us. The country is expensive and the people are jaded. I know, I've been here long enough. I've lived in the country and the city... everyplace is the same here, a ghetto ! And that coming from someone who makes more than 1.5 million yen above the national average... it aint about money, its about the people !As for all this...

"I do not see the Japan you see. It sounds as though Cleo and I found similar places."

Where in Tochigi ? Yo, I been there, done the gyoza thing.

"Children bow at crosswalks. The postmen smile."

So what ! Kids in America shake your hand, the waitress is able to make small talk, everyone knows their neighbours... hell here in Japan we hear story after story about how some old codger died and no one knew about it for months !

"The kids know the names of the neighborhood dogs."

Yes, but do the neighbours know your kids names ? Mine don't !

"We have a nice house and a productive garden."

I doubt it ! The average American house is 2,400 square feet... Japan ? 900 square feet !

"No successful cram schools. My daughter was earning her own money at age 10. My son at 8. My kids have bicycles and no security devices."

Congratulations... you are not the norm ! How do you feel ? Sorry Klein2 you are telling me stories about how "foreigners" live in Japan... not how everyone else does. Come back to this site when you can tell me about your morning commute on the yamanote... like most Japanese ! Or how you feel about working 14 hours a day, with no overtime pay... for years on end. That is the life of the regular Japanese. It's no wonder so many of them despise us... with our nice homes, gardens, living next to nobel prize winners. Wow, what a paradise... if only the average nihonjin could experience so much. I for one can't wait to get my family out of here. The cramped apartment we live in is a dump ! The yakuza living around the corner are creepy. The summers are horrible. The food is inadequate and often times limited. And once again Tokyo and Osaka are rated the worlds most expensive cities... this while salaries here are in decline. That is the reality for the Japanese that inhabit this land... consider yourself very fortunate kleine2.
Klein2 at 02:49 AM JST - 18th July

Gee Dick. False utopia. You are just full of oxymorons tonight. I will just let it go, but you are not making a great case for the US educational system.

My kids can walk through stores without looking at dirty magazines. I consider that part of being mature and tolerant. Apparently, some adult Americans have a problem doing that. It says more about American upbringing than Japanese.

Dick. You really should consider that a man who can be successful in another country and raise good children to be good citizens, providing for them and their mother during well, decades of recession, cannot be credibly called a slacker. I do have my shortcomings, but if that is not success, I do not know what is. When you grow up and find love of your own, I am sure you will understand.

It just so happened that Fugu was trying to impress me with how American he was, and it turned out that he started working later than I did. I walked to school more than he did too. I thought that was funny enough to comment about it.
Klein2 at 02:58 AM JST - 18th July

14 hours a day for years? You ARE a slacker!! LOL. I have been doing that for over a decade. I worked a year for free, willingly, eating rice and beans to save a company that eventually failed.

I am very fortunate. I am not interested in average, or Tokyo, or the Yamanote either. Been there and done that. Look. I made my choices early and stuck to them, that's all. I found what I found and posted on JT.

Japan is a good place FOR ME to raise children. I am an authority on myself, so there is no need for debate, really.
AndyG2009 at 08:28 AM JST - 19th July

-Klein2

Japan is a good place FOR ME to raise children. I am an authority on myself, so there is no need for debate, really.

If that’s the case, why did you post your messages here? I thought that you want to hear opinions from those whose experiences differ from your own. I grew up in Japan. From my experience, I don’t think Japan is a good place to raise kids. I don’t mean to say that my upbringing represents all the kinds of childhood experiences there, but my own experience has a lot in common with others there. Unfortunately, I didn’t live “among scientists and doctors and teachers, a Nobel prize winner, and a well known actress”. Such a privileged life was out of reach for a regular guy like me.

First, the schools seem to be a place for an endurance contest. If you are good at math, you have to wait for other kids who cannot care less about numbers to grasp the concept of basic math. No merit base classes in most of the schools. There is no wonder the Japanese top universities (like Tokyo University) are no match for the American top universities in the list of top 100 world universities. Kids with talents in some areas will waste their time and be forced to do the same thing as others.
Japanese teachers are authoritarian and sometimes physically abusive. I saw one of my friends beaten by a teacher simply because he questioned an accuracy of what the teacher said. There is no wonder why Japanese students are so timid and afraid of saying what is on their mind. Fear of telling their opinions is very common thing you see in Japan and is not a special situation at all.
Second, Japanese education focuses on memorization and their teaching methods are impractical.
I don’t think that people who only memorize a bunch of things can do well in the future competitions because people can simply use search engines. In many cases, teachers who cannot speak English teach students a special kind of English, “English for exams” (Jyuken Eigo). Because of this, many Americans who live there have to learn “Japanese English” otherwise it will be hard just to find “McDonald’s”.
I don’t have a problem with demanding education. I have a problem with schools that are demanding in a wrong way. Third, kids don’t have enough space. Since most of the kids live in or near big cities, lack of space is a common issue. Fourth, Japan is aging rapidly and 40% of Japanese people will be senior citizens in 40 years. It will be way too optimistic to think that a country that is going to be a super aged nation with a mountain of public debt will give kids a bright future. I think that one reason why Japanese young people don’t want to have kids is that they believe that the future is worse.
ritalynn at 12:58 PM JST - 19th July

I honestly can't say if it okay or not, i don't live there, and don't know anyone who went to school there. I'm sure every country has good points and bad points, it depends where you live. The countryside in japan might be better than a big city in the US. on the other side of the coin, a big city in japan might be worse than a big city in the US. Location, location, location.

But fuguyoutoo, if you hate japan so much why in the hell are you there?
lordomni at 12:51 AM JST - 20th July

The discussion is not 'is Japan a good place for you,' its about raising children. Just because there are bad things doesn't mean there are no good. Its entirely possibly Japan is great for fuguyoutoo, but still not a place he'd raise kids.
sf2k at 02:40 AM JST - 20th July

I would have thought not, given the racial discriminations but given the very thoughtful posts put here by those who have obviously worked it out and are living well then I'd say my mind has been changed. I hope it works out.
ritalynn at 03:37 AM JST - 21st July

lordomni I was talking about rasing kids and schools in my post. Maybe I should have been more clear.

And it dosen't sound like Japan is a great country in fuguyoutoo's eyes.