Wednesday February 15, 2012

tmarie's past comments

  • 2

    tmarie

    Den, back in the good old days people would drop dead at 70, not 90! That's 20 extra years of living with mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, the kids, a dog... People have bodily functions and lose their mind, hang on for years needing round the clock care for YEARS - for more than a parent ever looked after their kid when it comes to having to personally feed them, bathe them, change diapers... Thanks to modern science, we've got people up and around with very little mental abilities that need consistent care. Then you have others that have the brain but not the body that need constant care... A huge burden for a family.

    Posted in: 38-year-old man held for beating father to death while changing diaper

  • -2

    tmarie

    Uhhhh.... yes NetNinja... that's what prison is all about. But you forgot to mention that she has no freedom... minor detail.

    Oh no! Three hot meals a day and no freedom for less than 4.5 years because you know she'll get off early. They all do. It should be 4.5 years per kid served on after the other.

    Posted in: Woman sentenced to 4 1/2 years for breaking babies' legs

  • -1

    tmarie

    I'm telling ya, the sight of me with fish lips and sucking sounds get my kiss every time. I'm kind of sad that I don't even half to do it anymore! ;)

    Posted in: Lots of chocolate, but little love on Valentine’s Day in Japan

  • 0

    tmarie

    The unis are the ones that make them into drones - sadly. They come to us this way - and have a bit of a break and then go back to being drones. sad, isn't ?

    Posted in: Japan job treadmill grinds down workers and firms

  • -2

    tmarie

    Nicky, it has taken YEARS of training - he would never hold my hand (rarely does now) nor kiss me in public (I will make kissing noises if he tries to walk away from one which is much more embarrassing!!) - but I think he got used to it (worn down?) because I said it to him every time we hung up the phone or one of us left. He asked me why I do it and said, well, this is what my family does. Heaven forbid there is an accident and someone dies. At least we can have the knowledge that the last words spoken were "I love you". Never had a problem with it since.

    He's the furthest thing from romantic, never buys me little presents (we gave up on Xmas, anni, v-day) but he is good with hugs, kisses and the like. I hope he will be like this if we have future sprogs - I think he will be because he'll see me doing it and I'm like that with him.

    Indeed, most Japanese aren't touchy feely and yes, I do wonder if this is why Japan has "cyborgs" and issues with human connections/contact. They've done studies on this with babies - ones moms hug and once the mom ignores and lets cry and well, the "loved" baby functions better while the ignored kid has problems making friends and connecting with people. Was interesting to read!

    Posted in: Lots of chocolate, but little love on Valentine’s Day in Japan

  • 3

    tmarie

    I wish JT would not change the stories once they are already posted. Start a new article!!

    Posted in: Death toll climbs as heavy snow grips northern Japan

  • 1

    tmarie

    How about breaking her legs, letting her cry a little and then getting medical care because this is EXACTLY what happened to those poor babies. 4.5 years? The judge should hang his head in shame.

    Posted in: Woman sentenced to 4 1/2 years for breaking babies' legs

  • -2

    tmarie

    I think SpanishEyez, the question you need to ask yourself is, Do you think your partner would be the same way if he WASN'T married to you?.... Wouldn't we all be different people if we were married to someone else?

    I posted above Spanish and it seems we have a similar set up. Do I think my husband would be different if married to a japanese women? Sure I do. But that might not be an unloving relationship - perhaps she would clean the wax out of his ears like many do here as a sign of affection. It gives me the creeps personally but perhaps other people pity my husband for being married to a cold foreign wife who doesn't do that for him? I am the first one to think affection is missing in many marriages here but certainly not everyone married Japanese couple is un-affectionate or in an unloving relationship. Sadly though, I think may are - but then again, many are home.

    Posted in: Lots of chocolate, but little love on Valentine’s Day in Japan

  • 0

    tmarie

    They don't care about international talent though. They want cheap workers such as the Chinese and the Koreans so they can give them a low salary and have them work like dogs. Heck, they don't wanted talented Japanese - which is why so many flee when they look at the life that working in Japan offers them.

    Posted in: Japan job treadmill grinds down workers and firms

  • 0

    tmarie

    Well said Cleo!

    Posted in: Japan job treadmill grinds down workers and firms

  • 0

    tmarie

    Japan school/uni is designed to produce worker drones which kinda worked in the past but is wildly out of date now for a few decades.

    Is that a joke? Do you work at a uni here? The kids have way more freedom at uni than they will ever have in their life - they can complain about all those job interviews and whatnot all they like but they still manage to go out with friend, go shopping, take trips... I don't doubt the interviews are stressful but that stress is exactly what everyone back home does. Thing is, back home you actually failed courses, worked a decent number of hours with a PT job and mommy and daddy didn't pay for everything.

    Indeed, the test mentality is a harsh one for JHS/HS/Uni entrance but kindy and whatnot? That is the parents doing - as Cleo pointed out. If you want to see where the pressure comes from, check out the kyoiku mamas, not the school system.

    Posted in: Japan job treadmill grinds down workers and firms

  • 0

    tmarie

    Young Japanese has lost their temper... Sons and Daughters kill their Parents...even these youngsters can not keep mercy to at least their Parents...How can they show kindness... Mercy to others in the society . This is something... become natural today . I have heard these kind of killings many times...

    Don't forget the number of parents here who kill their kids...

    Indeed, the attitude that it is there job to look after their parents is an issue. Of course the government isn't going to try and change that mentality - they would have to provide the support!!

    My question is, how many people are "putting up" with the situation but could afford to pay for them to be put in homes? My GMIL is one. They family has enough money but yet, no budge in that direction. My MIL wants her to go, my FIL (his mother) won't even think about it. Stubborn man is working himself into an early grave by caring for his mom. Thing is, both PIL are stressed but refuse to seek outside help - mind you, what support is there really?

    Posted in: 38-year-old man held for beating father to death while changing diaper

  • 0

    tmarie

    I wonder when was the last time anyone heard the words "I Love You" from your Japanese spouse or partner? Today, like everyday, it is the last thing we said to each other when he went out the door. I shall add I get a kiss every morning before this "I love you" and one right before bed.

    Treat those who love the way you want to be treated. I don't think it is the "norm" here for couples to say it but how many times have YOU said it to your partner or spouse? You can't expect them to do certain things if you don't as well.

    Posted in: Lots of chocolate, but little love on Valentine’s Day in Japan

  • 5

    tmarie

    There are few of them but increasing daily - because smart business owners are seeing there is money to be made by catering to non-smokers. I am not 100% or nothing. If they have sections that actually work, by all means smoke away. Why are you so hostile about this? You guys rule here with being allowed to smoke pretty much everywhere. I am just asking for a non-smoking section and for it to be that - non-smoking.

    Posted in: Gov't figures show lowest ever percentage of smokers

  • 2

    tmarie

    Actually making a huff does change it - hence why so many places are creating non-smoking areas of banning smoking...

    Go back to your country... like I said, what do the locals do who agree with banning smoking?

    Posted in: Gov't figures show lowest ever percentage of smokers

  • 0

    tmarie

    Indeed - he is very clever and how could I possibly argue with that one? ;)

    Posted in: Lots of chocolate, but little love on Valentine’s Day in Japan

  • 3

    tmarie

    This really does show that the government doesn't give a damn what the public thinks. Over a majority oppose this buy burn, baby, burn. Disgusting. Maybe this will finally be what gets rid of ishihara???

    Posted in: Tokyo to begin incinerating tsunami debris after test burn ash deemed 'below legal limit'

  • 0

    tmarie

    Well said Nicky - though sometimes I do think my husband has a little cyborg in him!

    Cleo, is it ads or the pressure to do what the "norm" is? I know a few OL friends who HATE that they "have" to buy giri-choco for their bosses and male coworkers. If they don't, it will be noted and commented on by others. It makes an already crappy job worse. The same goes for the men on white-day! I BUY my husband's white-day giri-crap because I know how evil OLs can be (been a great book about it called Salaried men and office ladies) and the last thing I want is the office OLs teaming up against my husband. There is nothing friendly or nice about it. It is obligation - perhaps because of ads but I think it is more social norms at the office now. I find it sad.

    I used to enjoy v-day until I saw how "artificial" it is here - and yes, it is pretty darn artificial home but japan takes it to a whole new level of cold and consumerism. We don't celebrate it. I was sad when we first started dating that my husband didn't care but as he says, why do I need to show you on this one day that I love you when I should be doing that everyday!?

    Posted in: Lots of chocolate, but little love on Valentine’s Day in Japan

  • -1

    tmarie

    I have to admit, I love these ads. They are the only ones that don't make me roll my eyes or change the channel. They're clever and funny. And who doesn't love a cute, talking dog??

    Posted in: Reina Triendl joins White Family in Softbank Mobile ads

  • 0

    tmarie

    As I said a few days ago in the "son kills mother" article, this is going to increase if Japan doesn't step up and get more homes built. A man who needs to have his diaper changed and can't do it himself should NOT be living under the care of family members. The guy here is 38. What happens when he goes to work? Dad sits in his own mess which leads to other problems. If dad is fighting getting cleaned up, he's not all there and needs care than clearly this family wasn't getting.

    You can all condemn this man but how about having a little compassion for him too? Day in and day out of doing this and not knowing when it will end. Babies grow up and get out of diapers. Elderly parents just deteriorate.

    Posted in: 38-year-old man held for beating father to death while changing diaper

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